109 Rx Papi songs ranked

Ranking every song Rx Papi uploaded to his YouTube page this year

  1. “Anxiety (Walls Closing In)” 

This year you were being sad to Phoebe Bridgers’ Punisher while I was being sad to this. 

  1. “16 Fever” 

Rx Papi says he would win a fight against Jet Li, IP Man, Liu Kang, and Superman. I believe him. 

  1. “Nancy” 

Opening line of the year is clearly, “Young nigga stressed the fuck out/I feel like the black nigga on Get Out.” 

  1. “Darc Thoughts” 

  2. “Zebra Cakes”

  3. “I Forgot Who I Was” 

He brags that he looks better than King Tut, who according to Google looked like this:  

  1. “Drac and Josh” 

90% of Rx Papi music videos feature him drinking or smoking and staring at himself in a mirror.

 

  1. “Shorty Rider” 

  2. “Newnew” 

Rx Papi claims he looks like Tom Hanks and his girl looks like Ellen. Up for debate. 

  1. “Melrose Ave” 

  2. “I Forgot Where I Was Goin” 

  3. “2 Felonies and 3 Warrants in Different States” 

Rx Papi and Rx Nephew definitely have the most confusing beef of the year.

  1. “Classical” 

A reliable source told me they teach this in music theory at NYU. 

  1. “Far Away” 

  2. “Boss Top” 

  3. “Papi Ruthless” 

  4. “Missy Elliott” 

No idea what “Walk in this bitch like Monta Ellis” is supposed to mean in 2020, but it’s hard anyway. 

  1. “Free Bobby Shmurda” 

“Adios muchacho/556 like Mojo Jojo” Papi is clearly bilingual. 

  1. “Numbers” 

  2. “Drake” 

  3. “How I Feel” 

  4. “Couples Therapy” 

Nora Ephron who?

  1. “Johnny Tran Wit Da Snakeskin Pants” 

  2. “Boosie Fade” 

Rx Papi needs to face off against Bobby Valentino in a Verzuz. 

  1. “I Don’t Wanna Talk About It” 

Rx Papi could have made the Moesha theme song. 

  1. “Luol Deng” 

Somebody send this to Luol. 

  1. “Mr Magoo” 

Honestly had no idea who Mr Magoo was. After Googling I learned he was some bald headed animated dude from the 1950s. I learn a lot of important things from Rx Papi.

  1. “Cousin Tito” 

“I don’t like to look in the mirror too long/I don’t know the nigga who staring back at me”

  1. “Barnetta” 

  2. “Percocet” 

  3. “Napoleon Dynamite” 

“My bitch bad like Condoleezza Rice” 

  1. “5.56 God” 

  2. “Car Lot” 

  3. “5am In a Bad Mood” 

Papi says he walks in the trap like Larenz Tate, and I know he means Larenz in Menace II Society, but I’m pretending he means Larenz in Love Jones

  1. “Watever U Need” 

  2. “Silk Da Shoccer” 

  3. “It’s Jordy Callin” 

  4. “High In Detroit” 

  5. “V-Live” 

 

  1. “Peewee Longway” 

  2. “20 times”

  3. “No Ride”

  4. “All The Time” 

  5. “Nine 11” 

  6. “I’ll Clean It Later” 

  7. “Moet”

  8. “Big Slither” 

“They hated on Jesus for showing love” #facts 

  1. “Bedroom” 

  2. “Boy Who Cried Wolf” 

  3. “Kangaroo Jacc” 

I think Rx Papi thinks Al Pacino was in Kangaroo Jack

  1. “Haitian Donnie”

  2. “Don’t Change Ya Number” 

  3. “Bird Box” 

  4. “I Don’t Bump Blake Money No More” 

Rx Papi beefs are hard to keep up with, I respect all of the hate in his heart though. 

  1. “Billy Ado” 

  2. “Patience” 

  3. “In Tha Club”

  4. “Shadloc” 

  5. “I left my car keys” 

  6. “Abtar There” 

  7. “First Day Out” 

  8. “Runtz So Good” 

  9. “Runtz So Damn Good” 

  10. “King of New York”

“I love when papi talk about robbing ppl and selling crack 🤞🏽”- YouTube comment from Rx Nephew 

  1. “Corner Boy”

  2. “Criminal Intent” 

Sorry, Veeze did it better. 

  1. “Bernie Mac” 

  2. “Juelz”

  3. “ReddMan&Meth” 

 

  1. “DMX” 

  2. “Wildout Tia 1.5” 

  3. “1 Take” 

  4. “Bacc 2 Bacc” 

  5. “HalfCourt” 

  6. “Speedbump Curt” 

  7. “Wildout Tia 2” 

  8. “Fucc You If You Hatein” 

Some of the titles could use some workshopping, but also that’s what makes them perfect. 

  1. “3 6 Mafia” 

  2. “Sweetest Taboo” 

Sade cleared this sample just for Rx Papi.

  1. “SRT” 

  2. “Doggystyle”

  3. “Scratchin Off” 

  4. “BoosieBoo”

  5. “Hulk Hogan” 

  6. “Real Deal Slither” 

  7. “Autopsy”

  8. “Cartier Jigg” 

  9. “Adlibs”

  10. “6 AM” 

  11. “Truly Sorry”

  12. “Off Beat” 

  13. “Kissing Cousins”

“You on a air mattress in my living room/You was cold as fuck in the living room/Had an extra blanket I ain’t give it to you” #deep 

  1. “Like To Do” 

  2. “UAV” 

  3. “305 Trenches” 

  4. “Money Ragg Swagg” 

  5. “D.A.N. (Dawg Ass Nigga)” 

  6. “Awela” 

  7. “Paul Wall” 

Seven minutes of Papi and Nephew is stressful. 

  1. “Drug Addict”

  2. “Lilo and Stitch” 

  3. “My Brothers Keeper” 

  4. “Dance Moves”

  5. “Bugg Pt. 2” 

  6. “Make America Trap Again” 

Predictably Rx Papi’s politics are a mixed bag.

  1. “Wok Talk” 

  2. “Took It Back” 

  3. “Lucky Bandit” 

  4. “Jeep”

    Good music from Rx Papi this year. Let me know if I should rank Rx Nephew songs next.